back from KL.it wasnt a blast--for sure.pissed in many situations.pissed with people around me.practically just pissed most of the time.i suppose its cozz of my great disappointment.this christmas felt like crap.oh well, forget it.lets not talk about it anymore.

am back to reality.back to major where i last left it.time is tight.and i dont care.i;m doing what i can.i try not to linger off.try not to get distracted.but..the outcome is always the same.i end up sleeping or watching some dvd with the same usual excuse i give myself, "i'm tired, i need a break".aint sure wads gotten in to me.not a single stuff done and i feel exhausted.just like today.was out the whole day.went to sungei road then to bras basah to find some simple mechanism, hoping that it will more or less trigger some idea or inspiration.a failed trip--well, not totally tho.hhmm..time to buck up ade.time to really buck up.

*btw, i felt odd today, my first trip down to sungei road.with all the ah peks.sungei road brought out a different perspective of life--another side of singapore.it was so different.totally.maybe it was due to the environment in which i was brought up in.it was like..just..plain dirty.and perhapes i;m just not used to it.partly cozz paps a really clean person who adores mopping the floor til its sparkling clean and i grew up learning that this is the way a floor should be or feel like.i'm not discriminating sungei road or wad so ever.it;s just that the environment caused so much insecurity.the feeling of a different singapore.the impression of life in poverty.i know cases like these are worst in other 3rd world countries and i should count myself lucky and fortunate.and before i forget, i saw my shaker on the floor of some "shop" at sungei road.is that considered as an honorable thing?hhmmm...*ponders

ade:s @ Thursday, December 29, 2005