its amazing how you knock me off my feet.everytime you come around me i get weak.those laughter, those smiles + those unending exhaustion.for a reason, i know, i have a limit.i know that too clearly.i know exactly where i stand.i dont expect anything much from you.let alone any trace of concern.just allow me to adore you from afar.i'll be more than contented.trust me, i really will.i know what i need in my life.i need to persue what i truly enjoy doing.and for a fact, you are not part of it.my job/goal in life is to do something i love.something that ultimately makes me feel blessed and happy.and perhapes, that aint having you in my life.i live for myself.i need you as a motivator.that special someone who stands there firmly and aware of my current situation and what i really want in life.happiness means the whole world to me.and being myself makes me glad--utterly and helplessly glad.i dont wanna forsake myself, let alone my well-being for any other reasons.i dont wanna change a wee bit in my character.i love the way i am.and i'm just thankful that i'll not get mixed up with someone else.i dont live in someone else's shadow.so please be clear, i live for me and i walk in my own shadow.i dont need your love--just your attention will do.just allow me to stay right by your side and make you smile, that's good enough.and i'll be thankful.really will be.


<<>>
i'm attracted to you, yes i am
but when i realise i'm so into you,
so irresistably obsessed in you,
i know...
it's time to slowly let go.
that holding on too tightly and refusing to let go
might hurt me in the end.
i'll cut my fingers.
i'll cry and watch my wound bleed.
i'll cry my eyes out in a heart so filled with agony.
the time now is not too late.
so forgive me,
and allow me, to learn to let you go--gently.

ade:s @ Monday, July 04, 2005